Friends. Fam. I am back! Back where? In the studio!
It has been exactly 5 weeks since I published “Ugh. Ballet.” Therefore it has also been 5 weeks since I have stepped foot into a studio space, seen myself in a leotard, and attempted to lift my leg past the height of the couple inches it leaves the ground while walking…As some of you may remember this was because the studio stopped being my happy place. It stopped being a comforting environment that pushed me to want to go beyond my limits and try new things. It stopped encouraging me and loving me. It ultimately just dragged me down deeper day by day and my body, mind and soul couldn’t handle it anymore. Today though? Completely different story!
All my body could handle was a ‘simple’ 45min barre. I didn’t turn. I didn’t jump. I didn’t do anything aside from straight forward technique. I was taught by one of my favorite people, and the most encouraging individual in my life. I was surrounded with friends who lifted up my spirits and struggled through the physical pain along with me. It was a nurturing environment. I laughed. I smiled (When was the last time that happened…) I definitely broke a sweat. And I will for sure be sore tomorrow. But not the sore that dampers ones spirits, the good kind of sore that will keep me searching for more. Wanting to go back. Wanting to push past the hurdles I was working towards over a month ago. Eagerly waiting for the next time my body can move, be free and work this hard once again!
Taking a break can be very hard, but also very good. I am coming back feeling refreshed. Rejuvenated. And eager. I am ready to work hard to get back into shape. I am ready to stand in 5th position with no pain (who knew it could be so hard?!) I have clearly lost flexibility, strength and stamina, but the technique still remains. The technique that I am ready to improve and build off of to go further with my career. Tonight is motivating me to do so many things! New York is only 35 days away, and my body is clearly nowhere near ready! But now I feel like I can and I will get there! I will be ready and I will be excited to continue to learn and grow 🙂